I Hate Money
April 11, 2013 § 1 Comment
Overspending is one of life’s biggest temptations. Flip side of that temptation is compulsive saving. Whether you are saving out of fear or spending to fill needs that you haven’t identified, understanding your own self, figuring out what is going on in your mind and heart and addressing your real needs in smarter ways was the impetus behind my first book. I am on the lookout for other authors who address similar perspectives. And in an insightful book by author and friend Sarah Morehead, individual’s needs, be they unmet or met unwisely with crazy spending, are detailed and better options explained.
Here are some of Ms. Morehead’s points about our spending.
Why are you spending? – We spend because we are each, individually, motivated by different needs. Morehead uses common sense to help make this point more clear. She points out that siblings raised in the same household, who may hold very similar values about money, will still spend differently because of their unique motivators. If you are motivated by control, you might save every bit of money you have so that you can in some way, prevent bad things from happening to you.
She goes on with examples: Is being with friends and relationships so important, you will buy a round of drinks on a credit card so you can show your affection? Is status so important you must live in a certain area or drive a particular car to show you are special?
What is a need? – Morehead uses her study of psychology to break this money mystery apart for us. She explains that a car is not a need. TRANSPORTATION is the need. A car is your strategy to fill the need. It may also be a liability, from a purely financial perspective, as it may be money you now owe to the bank. This doesn’t make it bad. It simply is factually understanding your life and your money and pulling the emotions apart from the money.
A yoga or exercise class may fulfill your need to be healthy and to have relationships. Needs cannot be ignored. Left unmet you will find a way to meet them even if you sabotage your budget to do it. She urges then that you really understand your needs and work through them- and she helps you to do that in the book- with better, cheaper, smarter strategies, so you can fulfill those real needs.
A better strategy?- Using the above example of a need to exercise Morehead suggests that your need for health may be achieved less expensively by walking or buying used equipment to work out at home, etc.
In this case the other need for relationships would then be unmet. What ideas that don’t cost much money might be substituted to meet you need for friends? What about a volunteer organization, attending church, helping at your kids’ school, working with animals? What about being the house to party and inviting folks over for a potluck game night?
Face it: the needs you have are real. Knowing that allows you to address them with logic and reason. You don’t have to spend money and wreck your budget to be cozy, friend. (CR 9152)
Link to book through Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/HATE-Money-Understanding-Personality-ebook/dp/B004YX9UA0
It’s a very good book — extremely insightful.
Sarah’s current work touches on psychological distance and how it affects spending behavior. More great insights are on their way!