Facing Your Finances Alone
January 15, 2014 § Leave a comment
You may be facing this year on your own. The statistics for divorce show that about half of marriages each year-end. The average age of a widow in the US is about 60 years old. And you may have chosen a single life. Whatever your life is, here are some tips for managing your finances.
Understand your reality – Things may have recently changed. Your circumstances may be very different from they were even a few months ago. You need to wrap your wonderful brain around the truth of life. You need to look things squarely in the face, my friend. No games. Truth now.
Understand your fear – You also need to understand that some of what you are perceiving may be baloney because you have created monsters where none exist. Your fears are real to you, but may have no bearing in real life. They may be fears about the future – and you can’t predict the future. They may be fears that you ‘can’t do this.’ We have to move past this into the new land that is in front of us, but we can’t do that if you don’t recognize the terrain, including your fears. But in the end, let’s give the future the opportunity to turn out well and not so negatively color it.
Take excellent care – Take excellent care of yourself. You are amazing, have been through a lot, and need someone who understands you and your needs. And that person is YOU. So live a balanced life with plenty of rest, exercise, social connections and all the rest of the needs a human has for optimal health.
Get advice– Just because you live alone doesn’t mean you need to DO everything alone. There are caring experts with integrity in your area who will provide great advice for you in your circumstance. People whom you will be able to enthusiastically refer once you find them. You can be delighted with your experts. Don’t have someone with whom you are enthusiastic? They are out there! Don’t give up until you are happy.
Trust your instincts– You may not be an expert on all things. That’s why having advice is a benefit. But you can trust your gut on the integrity and truth-telling of your advisor. You know when things are baloney and when they are not. And if you don’t know, bring a friend along who reads people well to give you some feedback in your decision-making. You are not inconveniencing a friend to get their input. You would do the same for your buds, and do it enthusiastically.
Be a great friend– Speaking of friendship, be a terrific friend to yourself. Say encouraging things about your behavior, your reflection in the mirror, about your life and future. Be a friend filled with hope and vision of wonderful days of blessing ahead of this beautiful person. And if you don’t have anything good to say, don’t say anything at all. Just as your mom told you.
Do not borrow trouble. Anticipate good things filled in the center with juicy surprises of hope and wonder. Say it with me: This is going to be a very good season of life. (CR9740)